It's amazing to think that in only 6 weeks ... *6* WEEKS ... I will be a Nurse Graduate. The ultimate end of 5.5 years in college. It's amazingly terrifying. I have confidence, yet I don't. I have so much to learn and it will only be the beginning of my career.
First, I will have to find a job. I had thought my current employer was game with transitioning me from CNA to NG to RN, but now I have my doubts. My Nursing Director has been very evasive and vague with answers. The Medical Director of my department, as well multiple Providers and Nurses, are expecting me to be hired, but unfortunately I don't have an answer for them. I don't want to stir up controversy if they start asking my Director "WTF?" but I cannot control what they do. I do have to say, that it would be nice if they rose to support me on their own. They have been there to support me all the way through school and I would like to start in a place that I am comfortable while I take the leap from Student to RN. We'll see. One Nurse did offer to write me a letter of recommendation for my job search. That will be greatly appreciated.
Meanwhile, I have sucked it up and started applying elsewhere. It's been a week since I submitted an application to another hospital and I haven't gotten a phone call, so that makes me nervous as well. I'm going to take the opportunity on lunch break between lectures today to call their HR Department. It's been a long time since I've been in this position and it's more than a little nerveracking. I've been at the same hospital for over 6 years, and like I said, I'm comfortable there. I have built a great rapport with Medical, Nursing, and Ancillary staff that I would be greatly saddened to leave behind. But, one thing at a time ... I just have a tendency to jump to the worst case scenario. It's a hazard of working in EMS.
This week won't be all that eventful school-wise. I have an exam 1 week from today and a paper due a few weeks from today. The paper is almost done, it's a self assessment (and I DETEST those). I have 6 shifts left with my Preceptor. She's amazing and I have to say that I hope I make her proud as a Nurse. She's very concerned with my progress and how I feel about my work.
On a side note - I've spent the last few days watching the pictures roll in from my EMS family regarding Sandy. Here I am counting my next 6 weeks while NYC was flooded and burned (in places). A fellow nursing student's family is on Long Island and their home is now condemned. I never watched "Jersey Shore," but I cannot help but hurt for those affected. All of this right before the holidays. So as I sit here counting down, I'm also counting my blessings.